A partial baptism, a “splash zone” warning, a lost ring, and getting rebaptized

About 6 years ago, I had a chance to perform my first baptism.  Needless to say, I was a little nervous.  The lady I was baptizing was sweet, but relatively timid.  After she read her story of beginning her journey with Christ, she turned and got ready to be baptized.  I said a few quick encouraging words, then proceeded to lower her down into the water.  It was at that point that I saw a look of fear in her eyes and I realized we were in for an interesting experience.  As her head got closer to the surface of the water, she locked her entire body and “refused” to go under.  Now, until you’re in a situation like that for yourself, you can’t even begin to say what you would do.  In my case, I had a choice…force this lady under and allow her to experience what it would be like to feel like she was drowning (that was the look in her eyes)…or realize that baptism is merely symbolic, that she had followed through with the “public” response to her new relationship with Christ, and bring her back up even though her chin, cheeks, nose, eyes and forehead weren’t actually wet.  I decided to just bring her back up and save the embarrasment of her swallowing a lung-full of water.  I quickly found out that it takes years to live down a “partial baptism” story among pastors.

Two weeks after my partial baptism, I was baptizing a guy that was anything but timid.  His testimony was of a rough life, and a dramatic change that Christ had made.  He was excited…so excited in fact that after reading his testimony, he didn’t even wait for me to say any encouraging words to him.  Instead, he set his testimony down on the side of the baptistry, and just dropped backwards into the water.  I literally had to “catch” him on the way down.  Because he dropped with such force, water splashed everywhere…including over the little glass front and onto the choir below.   I quickly found out that it takes years to live down stories of baptisms where you soak the choir…I heard many jokes about posting “splash zone” warnings when I baptized people.

So those were my first two baptisms.

Now, for my most recent two baptism stories that it will take years to live down.

The first story doesn’t actually involve me and water…but me and words.  Yesterday, at Church At The Grove’s Baptism Celebration, we had to change plans at the last minute and Russ asked me to explain baptism to everyone.  I usually do a pretty good job thinking on my feet, but “my feet” were failing me yesterday – twice.  I resorted to the easiest and clearest illustration I could think of to explain the symbolism and importance of baptism…my wedding ring.  When Amy and I got married, I put my wedding ring on to publicly display to everyone that I had a unique relationship with my wife.  The wedding ring doesn’t make us married…it is only symbolic.  However, it is an important step in showing my wife that I love her and the people around me that I love Amy…imagine me saying at the altar that I actually didn’t want to wear my ring because I really didn’t want people to know I was married.  So, I started my explanation and then pointed to my left hand to show how my ring acts as a symbol…and as I pointed to it, I realized the fatal flaw of this illustration…four weeks ago, I lost my ring.  The touching and moving spiritual explanation of baptism was now officially over.  I think I am about to see how many years it will take to live down using a “lost ring” as an illustration.

And, later that morning, I got re-baptized…unintentionally.  I was baptizing a man that is even bigger than I am.  As I was lowering him into the water, I was already preparing to lift him back up.  There’s a basic technique for baptizing people larger than yourself…when you get ready to lift them out of the water, you take a small step back with your right foot to stabilize the two of you and then you lift.  As I stepped, I suddenly realized that I was in a small portable hot tub with a “seat” directly behind my right foot instead of any place to step.  My foot slid along that seat for a moment trying to find a place to settle…it never did.  Again, I had a decision to make…drop him and save myself…or have a seat and help him up from there.  I had a seat…and got wet up to my shoulders…basically I got rebaptized.

So, with my “rebaptism” yesterday, I guess I just “retold” everyone about the relationship I have with Jesus.  Now, I’ve got to go buy a replacement wedding band…you’re insane if you think I’m going to show up next Sunday without a way to “retell” everyone that I’m married to the most incredible woman in the world.